November Social Work Newsletter
Preventing Power struggles
Everybody has gotten into power struggles with a preschooler before. These struggles often leave you and your child frustrated and feeling like your self control has been stretched to the limit. Here are a few ways to ease the tension.
1. Keep only a few essential rules in your house and explain them in simple
terms your child will understand. Reviewing the rules regularly is helpful.
2. Providing your child choices helps them feel like they are in control. You
can give them 2 options, both you would be comfortable with them
choosing. (Do you want to brush your teeth before or after your bath?)
3. Pick your battles. You have heard it before and it is a good motto to live
by. Not all battles are worth the struggle that might ensue. Consider this
before waging a battle with your preschooler.
4. Anticipate problems before they happen. If you know cleaning up toys
before leaving the house will start a struggle, come up with strategies to
prevent the struggle (e.g. providing a warning). ” In 2 minutes we will clean
up”. Set a timer, or give specific clean up instructions (you can clean up
the blue car and the dinosaur OR pick three items to clean, etc).
What should you do if you start to feel out of control?
-Give yourself a break and remove yourself from the situation. Take some deep
breaths, call a friend or have a cup of coffee, something to collect yourself.
-Take a moment to consider the issues. Is this something worthy of the struggle.
-Ask yourself why you are so angry? Does your anger match the misbehavior?
-Think about what might be behind your child’s behavior.
Jen Fine, LCSW
Pre-K Social Worker
Boletín de Trabajo Social Mes de Noviembre
Previniendo la Lucha de Poder
Todos hemos atravesado por la lucha de poder con nuestros niños en edad preescolar. Estas luchas muy a menudo causan frustración a usted y a su niños(as) y le hace sentir que el control sobre sí mismo ha sido probado hasta el límite. Aquí les presento algunas maneras de cómo usted puede reducir esta tensión:
1. Mantenga sólo unas pocas reglas esenciales en su casa y explíquelas en términos
sencillos para que su hijo(a) las entienda. Revise las normas con regularidad.
2. Ofrezca opciones a su hijo(a) para que sienta que es él /ella quien tiene el
control. Puede darle dos opciones, ambas con las que usted se sienta cómodo.
(¿Quieres lavarte los dientes antes o después del baño?).
3. Elige tus batallas. Ya lo has oído antes y es un buen lema. No todas las batallas
merecen la pena. Considere esto antes de librar una batalla con su hijo(a) en
edad preescolar.
4. Anticipate problems before they happen. If you know cleaning up toys
before leaving the house will start a struggle, come up with strategies to
prevent the struggle (e.g. providing a warning). ” In 2 minutes we will clean
up”. Set a timer, or give specific clean up instructions (you can clean up
the blue car and the dinosaur OR pick three items to clean, etc).
What should you do if you start to feel out of control?
-Give yourself a break and remove yourself from the situation. Take some deep
breaths, call a friend or have a cup of coffee, something to collect yourself.
-Take a moment to consider the issues. Is this something worthy of the struggle.
-Ask yourself why you are so angry? Does your anger match the misbehavior?
-Think about what might be behind your child’s behavior.
Jen Fine, LCSW
Pre-K Social Worker